Please Define Substance Abuse

Like pornography, we'll know it when we see it!

Except for those raised in a phone booth, all humans engaged, as children, in an activity which could be categorized as masochistic.

It consisted of spinning our bodies around and around until we fell down on the grass or ground, from which position we could look up and see the world rotating slowly around us. What an amazingly wonderful feeling that was, unless it was accompanied by nausea and vomiting, which reduced its attractiveness.

Not until adulthood, and the realization that the "wonderful feeling" was called vertigo, and should be avoided, did most of us abandon the sport. Kids seem to enjoy odd brain symptoms and often encourage their appearance. The resultant behavior attracts the admiration of some and the concern (or horror) of others, particularly parents.

Ingestion of various chemicals, alcohol included, is likely to produce brain symptoms that are unusual, often exciting, and draw attention to the user. Some children discover this at an early age, like 10 to 12 years. (A whole brewery full of beverages is often at their disposal in the homes of absent parents.) Now they have a secret thing to giggle over, talk about, and repeat as often as possible. Perhaps there is a bit of parental example to be found here, making it easier for the younger set to follow suit.

Although occasionally a child will die as a result of pediatric exposure to alcohol (from overdose or accidental injury), this is fortunately a fairly rare outcome. So if hardly anyone dies, and the main side effect is nausea and vomiting, it must be relatively harmless, right? "Millions of America's children can't be wrong!" Hmm. "Relatively harmless."

Fast forward to age 16, the buzz is there's a party and it will be wet. How do we (and have for centuries) describe the importance of belonging and impressing others of the same age? Here's how: To be left on the sidelines is a mortal wound, from which recovery will be nearly impossible. Besides, look at all the fun those guys are having, getting out of their heads. Give me whatever it takes to make me that way too!

Next stop, Spring Break from college, and all the cool, neat, etc., people are going to Mexico for a really good time. Everybody does it, and look at this - only three of us died last year out of, what, a thousand or so on this beach. Do whatever it takes to slip out of your regular mind and into something else. It's no worse than when you were a little kid spinning around in the backyard.

Well, that's not so true, since the truism is that as we get older, and our imaginations run wilder, we can damage ourselves faster. We and our accomplices invent new and different ways to add excitement to our otherwise drab lives. Cars and boats and other high powered toys are included here. About 1500 of our best and brightest young people die each year from the direct effects of alcohol. The toll from behavior gone wrong with the assistance of chemicals is hugely higher and difficult to define accurately.

Time Magazine, one of our "journal" sources, recently did a feature piece on binge drinking among young women. Most of you have read it, or are aware of it. Gender equality has reached the bar! No longer does the "gentle sex" offer a restraining influence on the drinking habits of the USA. (Carrie Nation is spinning in her grave, probably suffering from vertigo!) Many actually feel it is important to prove their ability to keep up with the guys in the previously male dominated sport of two-fisted drinking. Everyone has to get bombed, blasted, whatever, as quickly as possible. Never mind that poor decisions (degrading or life-threatening to various degrees) are likely to follow. The survivors will all laugh about it tomorrow, recalling the bizarre behavior of not only Dick but Jane as well.

Maturity might be defined as an age when we no longer court the feeling that the world is spinning around, out of control. It's an age at which we finally experience the light bulb effect of enlightenment: "Gee, having my brain function on all eight (six? four???) cylinders really feels good. I believe I'll stop doing wild gyrations with my friends." Our best hope is that our children are able to reach maturity with their bodies and brains intact. Many of the consequences of being one of the gang are irreversible.